Dreaming in Nauvoo

Every morning on the way home from work (I come home at 8am) my wife wants to tell me all about her dreams. She has many strange and odd dreams about everything. Many times I have no clue what she’s talking about, but she is talking about her dreams. I don’t remember my dreams very often. I’m not sure why this is. Allison says that men just don’t remember dreams. It has something to do with my biology. I can accept this. The question is if I do remember a dream is it important? Is it really a repressed memory? I don’t know. A while ago I had a dream. I still remember it days later, which makes me wonder if it was real.

My dream takes place when I was a teen, probably around 14 or 15. I was out on a scouting trip; a scouting trip with my Father. We were going canoeing or kayaking. Here’s the weird part we were doing it in Nauvoo. When I think of Nauvoo, I’m not talking about the church part, but the real city part. With buildings and houses people live in. It was really weird, because Nauvoo is on the Mississippi and you don’t go canoeing on the Mississippi. I think I might have been dreaming about the New River in West Virginia and the city of Nauvoo. Both places I’ve been as a Boy Scout.

During the rafting part of the trip my canoe flipped over and I was hurt. My arm might have been broken, but I never found out. My Dad got me out of the river and drove us into Nauvoo. Once we got there he refused to take me to the hospital. Instead he drove me to an Appliance store. I kept asking to go to the hospital, but my Dad said he knew a guy here that would fix me right up. I thought this was weird, considering I don’t think my father would ever deny me medical attention if I was hurt. I sat on a washing machine as I waited for this guy my dad knew.

My dream took an odd turn here. I found some old school Human Torch comics while waiting. I’m talking 1940’s Human Torch comics. This is the android Human Torch from Timely Comics (which later became Marvel Comics). While looking at them I realized they were about me. I was this android and these were stories about me in the 40’s.

The guy finally showed up to look at my arm during this part. He was wearing jean overalls and hat. He looked like a mechanic more than a doctor. He looked at my arm and was like the kid will be fine. Then the dream ended.

So weird and odd. I don’t think I’m the Human Torch or that my Dad refused to take me to the hospital, but what could this dream mean. I’ve been thinking about it for over a week and I have no clue. Maybe it means nothing and I just remember it because it had my Dad in it. I don’t know if I’ll ever really know.

chapbook

This week I have been ignoring my school work, which is normal for me, and been focusing on Allison’s school work, which is not usual for me. About a month ago Allison asked me to illustrate her chapbook for her. I thought she called it a chatbook, which makes more sense than being called a chapbook. My friend Seej looked it up on Wikipedia to find out what a chapbook is. Wiki said, “Chapbook is a generic term to cover a particular genre of pocket-sized booklet, popular from the sixteenth through to the later part of the nineteenth century. No exact definition can be applied.” Well what I illustrated was a book of poems for Allison. She’s in an advanced poetry class and she wanted me to illustrate them for her collection. This is probably the first time I’ve ever actually illustrated something for someone else. I don’t know of anyone who writes things that need to be illustrated. It was so awesome to help Allison out. I wanted to share some of the illustrations I did for the chapbook. I hope you enjoi.

(Note to see the full sized pictures you need to click on them.)

This is the cover; the chapbook is entitled monsters of my heart. The title actually came after the drawing. It might have had some influence on the name.

This next picture is the illustration for the poem Sixteen. This poem is amazing, like all of Allison's poems. If you can figure out what the poem is about from this picture that would be awesome.





This last picture is the back cover. I actually drew this a really long time ago, but I just colored this picture this week. I felt this was a perfect endcap for the book. You would have to read the poems to understand, but it's perfect. Allison also loves trees, so it makes senses that the tree would replace a monster in the heart.



There were more illustrations, but some of them are old and one of them frames the poem it is illustrating. So this is all you get.

it's christmas time again

It's Christmas time again. We've seen snow fall from the sky already out here in Idaho. Thanksgiving is over, even if it's just a few days out. With the end of Thanksgiving it is time to put up the Christmas Tree. Luckily this is the first Christmas I have with my wife. We decide that it was time to buy a tree yesterday. We got a small four ft. tree from walmart and then decorated it last night.


Here we are getting ready to put the ornaments on:

I was lucky this year. I got to put the star on top of the tree. I've never got to do that before.

Unfortunately the first try was not the best. Poor little tree didn't like the weight of the star.

Luckily we finally got it all together and Allison was able to light the tree! Now that is just awesome.

Look it's the McLean's in front of their very first Christmas Tree! How awesome is that.

Christmas has come to the McLean home a little early in my opinion, but it's still the best thing ever. Merry Christmas to everyone.

one month

One month today. I have been married a whole months as of today. It’s strange to think I’ve only been married to Allison one month today. It feels like we’ve been together so much longer than a month. I would have thought we were at a year almost, but that would be impossible. So here we are one month into our marriage. I remember our single ward bishop telling us that if we could make it through the first five days we could make it through anything. Another person told us that if we could survive the first five years we would be set to go. I really don’t believe either of them though. The first five days with Allison were to amazing to even think about leaving. I was in total bliss. How could I not make it through the first five days? I know that’s the honeymoon stage and I’m sure I’m still in the honeymoon stage because I can’t imagine a world without Allison. In five years I have no clue how I’ll feel. I will be a different a person. I will be future Michael and future Michael is not me. It’s a Michael that could be a better husband and person all around or he could be a new jack the ripper. Future Michael is a scary thing to think about, because I should know him, but I don’t. That’s not the point; the point is how does making it through five years guarantee that you’ll never break up? It doesn’t. That’s all I’m saying. I know marriage isn’t easy and that I’m always going to have to work at it. That doesn’t make me mad or sad. It’s just a fact of life. I’m really happy for the fact that I am married, that I do have a wife. My wife is amazing. I couldn’t ask for a better person to be married too. The future can hold so many things. I never saw myself married to Allison two years ago when I first meet her, but past Mike had no clue who future Michael was going to be and who he was going to love. I’m so lucky that I did decide to fall for my love. She has brightened my world a hundred time a million. I never want to be without her again. This past month has been the best month of my life. It hasn’t been perfect, but it has been better than anything I’ve ever experienced before. To Allison, thank you for one magical month. I can’t wait to spend the rest of all my months with you. I love you, Michael.

i heart nerds

I am a nerd. I have no problems with the fact that I love comic books and know more about science fiction movies than football. I have always been a nerd and always will be. My nerdiness helped me land the hottest girl I’ve known. Yet my nerdiness comes from an odd source. I believe it comes from my love of nerds candy. I’ve been eating those sweet candies since I lived in Iowa. That would be my entire candy eating life. Over this beautiful Halloween season my wife and I bought candy to give out the tricker treaters. In the end no children ended up at our place (just like I wished). So now we have a ton of beautiful candy to eat. Could life get any better? One of the candies I picked to eat was nerds. I love those little candies. This got me thinking about why do I love nerds candy? It goes back to living in Cedar Rapids, when my father was the Parks Director for the city. I remember going to different sites as a kid with him. This was when I was quite young so I’m not sure what kind of buildings they were, but they had candy. That was the best thing about going out with my Dad on his calls. You would get candy at the different offices. One of the main candies they all seemed to have was nerds. They came in the small box with just one flavor, but it seemed like a ton of candy. All these delicious candies in a perfect sized box for a kid. I loved those candies, I still love those candies. It was a little frightening going to some of those building with my Dad, but the nerds made it worth it. I’m sure some of the buildings were maintenance buildings which have scary machines in them. In the long end of the story, my father is the reason I’m a nerd. He feed me so many of those nerds candies that I had no chance of being anything else. Good thing my wife loves my nerdiness or else I would have to do something about it.

the weight

One week ago I was married to my wife. It has been one of the most amazing weeks since then. I consider myself the luckiest guy in all of Idaho right now. With marriage comes a new ordainment to my body. I am now wearing a wedding ring. I’ve never been much of a jewelry guy in my life. My senior year in high school is the only other time I’ve ever really worn a ring. It was a small one I wore on my middle finger. I wore it for about four or five months before I got sick of it and it broke on me. I never replaced it, because I no longer felt like wearing jewelry. My wedding ring is very different than that ring. For one it’s on my ring finger instead of my middle finger. Second it’s much heavier than that ring. It feels like my finger is getting a work out all day. By the end of the night I can barely lift my hand. I’ve never felt like this before. It’s just a ring on my finger and my whole hand is sore. I want to just put my finger into a sling because it’s so heavy.

This weight is more than just physical weight. The soreness is also a reminder of the fact that I’m married. I have never been one of those guys who believe that marriage is prison or the end of my life. I am now seeing why people might say that. My wife is amazing, but this ring is a huge weight. It’s like I have a ball and chain to my finger. The weight helps me remember my wife too. It helps me remember how much she loves. It’s there to help me remember that I have someone to go home to every night. It’s there to show me that I’m no longer alone. My finger might feel like it has a weight on it, but my soul feels as if a weight has been lifted off it. It’s such an odd feeling. My hand feels weighed down, but my soul is feeling like it’s in the heavens. Only my wife has been able to make me feel the way I am. I’ll take a sore hand for a while to be with the most wonderful woman in the world.

a new mclean

There is a new McLean in my family, no I’m not talking about Hattie (although I can’t wait to meet her). I’m talking about my new wife. This last weekend I was married to my love. It was one long weekend with so many things that needed to be done, but it’s over now. I am a married man and I happy. I never thought I could be this happy for this long. I’ve never felt such joy and love in my life. I love that I have a wife. Someone I can talk to and just be with. Life is excellent. She makes everything better. I’ve know this for awhile now. That is actually why I decide to marry my wife. When I am with her she makes me feel a hundred times better than I had ever felt before. I knew she did this to me long before we got married or even dated. Insert awesome story now: I remember last October she got my full attention for the first time. I had known her for about a year before that, but didn’t really have an interest in dating her. Like people say it wasn’t the right time yet. We were at this church Halloween dance. I was rolling (rolling means to go with as a friend) with Dan to this dance. I was trying to help hook him up with this a girl he liked. At this dance was my (future) wife. My wife was amazing that night. She dress up as a gypsy and was looking pretty hot. She kept getting close to me, even though I wasn’t dress up at all. I dance at least three slow songs with her. If you’ve been to a church dance during this period you would know that they only play about six slow songs the whole night, if you’re lucky. I danced every slow song I heard with her (oh yes I was lucky). Then during fast songs I was working to help Dan out and she still ended up near me. At one point she got really hot and took off one of her million layers she was wearing. After doing this she came up to me and said I just took off my jacket (or something like that), what else should I take off? That comment made me think this is the girl for me. At the same time, I was like no way, this girl is way out of my normal league of dating. She was so beautiful and fun. That dance is what started a one year quest that made her my wife. I didn’t start out with that in mind. I was just looking for a girl to date. I didn’t start dating her till January, but I started to talk to her at church and school. I started to get to know the most amazing person I’ve ever met in my life. To think it all started because she kept standing next to me at a Halloween dance and ask me to dance. Now there’s a new McLean that is way awesome. No offense to the pervious McLean women in my life, but I love my wife. I love the fact that it took me a year to realize she was awesome and then another few months to even get the courage to ask her out. As Mary Jane Watson says, “You hit the Jackpot, Tiger.” Oh, I hit it hard.